Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Fun At Aaron's Wedding

All right, boys.  Sorry about the delay, but here's the skinny on My Night at Aaron's Wedding.

First off, NO KOGEL DOGS!  (I had been told there would be Kogel Dogs.)  There was, upon arrival, a lovely spread of various salads and pickles and olives and crackers--the liver pate was my personal favorite--and there was an open bar, so my disappointment in, (not to mention my remembrance of) the Dog situation was short-lived.

Now, here's the thing: I told my wife I was going to wear a brown checked sportscoat and tan slacks and she said, and I quote, "You will look nice in that."  Well, perhaps, but this was a pretty REALLY Orthodox affair and of all the men there--and the crowd it seemed to me was maybe 300 people--I was the only one not wearing a black suit.  I could not have stood out more had I simply worn my goalie gear, complete with skates and mask.  Here's what I mean.

Can you spot the Gentile in this photograph?

As for the Groom, he was at the head table in a room set aside from the main reception hall as the wedding guests arrived and scarfed down all of that pre-wedding food.  It was interesting in that they had all of the men in one room and all of the women in another.  Personally, I would have rather hung out with all the girls, but hey, that's just me.  Anyway, here's our man now, during what, for want of a better term, I would call the Pregame, about an hour or so before the ceremony itself.

Note the ample supply of alcoholic beverages at the ready...

About an hour and a half after arrival, Aaron was ushered into the Wedding Hall itself amid much fanfare and loud singing and the ceremony began.  At least I think it did.  I was hanging back with our lawyer buddy Solomon and we didn't exactly have the best seats in the house.  We were Standing Room Only, in fact.

Say buddy, how about taking off that hat? I can't seem a damn thing back here!

Solomon, in addition to being a fine young attorney and hockey player, was a veritable font of information.  During the vows (which we pretty much couldn't hear anyway) he told me, well actually, first he told me, "Mazeltov!" to which I said, "Dude, that's not even a word," and he then told me things like, for example, every woman there was wearing a wig.  Some sort of a custom. Even the girls with beautiful hair of their own were wearing wigs. They all looked very nice, in case you were wondering.  Then he told me that when we got to the reception hall, I would find it divided by a curtain designed to keep the men on one side and the women on the other and that the men would dance with men and the women would dance with women and I said, "Well, that's just messed up."

The last time I got invited to a guys-only party, I'm not going to lie to you, things could have turned out better.

Although they did set a fine table, I must say.

WAY too nice for Kogel Dogs although Paulie's jerky would have fit right in.

Anyway, I decided I would leave at this point even if there were a couple of guys who I was kinda hoping would ask me to dance.  And on my way out, I got the money shot.  The Happy Couple!

I told you guys she was really pretty!

So, our best wishes to the Newlyweds from all of us at the Oak Park Hockey Guys Who Play on Tuesdays and Thursdays!